Like a Horse with Blinders

Maybe it was Lauren's diagnosis of autism that made Kevin and I a lot more conscious that we needed to physically spend time with her to engage her. We could not take the easy way out to just leave her with the TV and video (so 90s I know) and cds (better?) with her.

Much of what we take for granted like, kids learning from their surroundings, picking up our good and bad nuances, Lauren could not do. If you imagine a horse walking with blinders on, that would be how Lauren learns. A horse with blinders is focused only on the task ahead. Without the blinders, the horse would be distracted by its surroundings and unfocused on walking or galloping straight ahead.

Illustration by Luke Sim, copyright 2015

When Lauren is watching her videos, she is completely focused on her show. When she is playing with her toys, her attention is only on her blocks and dolls. And now when she is reading her books, she is fully immersed in her stories. Even when she is just walking along the park or road, she is focused on walking...only.

Her ears do not pick up on the spoken conversations around her, nor do her eyes observe the social activities around her. Unless called by name to watch or listen, Lauren does not.

This explains why Lauren speaks with an American accent. She has never set foot on America, yet she speaks like one. 99% of the shows she watches are American. Add on to this, 99% of what she reads are written by Americans. Dorky Diaries, Big Nate, Diary of a Wimpy Kid...ahh...the proliferation of American culture. Material for another article brewing here...:-)

Lauren opens her mouth and you hear American slang words complete with the accent!
OMG!
What the...!
Gross!
Awesome!
Totally rad...

And when talking to Lauren, the worse thing I could do is, tell Lauren to do something with my back turned to her, and of course hers to mine, and nothing ever happens! When we want Lauren to pay attention to what we are doing or saying, we first
1. Call her by name
2. Ask her to watch us
3. Then Kevin and I proceed to show her how something is said or done
Her eyes have to be on the task and not wandering somewhere else.
4. And lastly, we ask Lauren to repeat to us what we have shown her or told her

Why do the steps have to be broken down? Remember my article on Sensory Processing Disorders, where for a person with autism, they have many other sensory input coming at them, all at the same time? http://www.whatsnextkids.blogspot.com.au/2015/04/we-have-seven-sensesreally.html

Imagine trying to listen to what your friend was saying, but there was also the radio blaring in the background, construction happening somewhere further off, and lights flickering on and off. Makes it quite difficult to concentrate on your friend, yes?

Welcome to the life of Lauren. Too much input. One mind. One set of ears. One set of eyes. Horse with blinders, so they can cope without a sensory overload.

Next time you speak with a person with autism, take it one step at a time. It isn't because people with autism are slow. Seeing Dr Temple Grandin, Stephen Wiltshire, Naoki Higashida have shown us the opposite. They are just wired differently from you and me.

Thanks for sharing my thoughts. Share with me yours, ok.


Tolerance, Compromise, Understanding, Acceptance, Patience - I want those all to be very sharp tools in my shed - Cee Lo Green-